Need to Cry? Need a Shoulder? Need Some Scizzors?

Read below other Breakup Stories and know you are not alone. Please do not use real names in your stories to protect you and the other person. Just give them and you a name and get it out, spill and pour your brains out. Lizzie will read each one, if you need help now tell her to call you and the two of you can decide what program to do.
Also she likes to read of some of the Breakup Stories on You Tube that really get to her, so please do not use real names or put a note to NOT READ!

Lost In New York....

2006-03-04 01:03:31

I woke up one day and looked at myself in the mirror and said "How the hell did this happen?" I found myself alone in a city with no friends, no family, a drinking problem and on the verge of being fired from my job. All of this because I got broken up with. How was I going to piece my life together without him was all I could think. It seemed impossible but I hit rock bottom and couldn't watch myself deteriorate any longer. I couldn't take one more sleepless night of endless dreams about him or the fact that I couldn't sleep unless I was drunk(or should I say passout). My anxiety attacks and depression were getting worse every minute and I thought I was going crazy or going to die but I couldn't talk to anyone because they would only think that I was crazy. I was like a walking zombie that couldn't think straight or function and my thoughts were driving me crazy! Somebody help me please!!! I couldn't talk to my family because I didn't want them to worry about me and I didn't have any friends because I moved here to be with him and he was all I had here. So, I had to start from scratch. The first thing I had to do was get my ass out of bed and save my job before I had homeless to add to my list. Then, I joined a gym and starting working out to get my self esteem back and thought it would be a good way to meet people at the same time. I started going out with people from work and making friends everything seemed like it was working itself out. I was going to survive this heartache that seemed unbearable just months ago. I wish that I would have had people to talk to during this breakup people who have gone through it or were going through it to help me. Maybe I wouldn't have felt so crazy if other people could share there stories with me. I'm glad to say that I am happier now than I ever was with him. I got to know myself and know what I am looking for in a guy. But I have to admit that it was the hardest thing I ever had to go through.

What Was I Thinking.....

2006-03-04 02:03:52

6 years later after dating my boyfriend it finally dawned on me that he was not the person whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. 6 years of good times but towards the end more bad. I was devastated and heart broken but knew that if I stayed because it seemed like the easy way out it would end in divorce. I have come from a broken family and I would be damned if I was going to make the same mistakes. I knew that night as I crawled into bed with him that it was going to be the last. As I took one last look around his room, I cried myself to sleep with no words to express the utter devastation that I felt. He has such a big piece of my heart and he knew how to keep it broken. The day I will never forget is when I informed him about my mother having cancer he had called my friend to come over and be with me. He was only in New Jersey...what a complete loser! I have been single for a year now and do not know how I made it through the worst pain I have ever encountered. I have had some help from my friends, family and of course the bottle. It still hurts to think about him at times but I know it will pass and that someone is going to come and sweep me off my feet. As of right now I am taking one step at a time toward a more independent and happier me.

Catherine

2006-08-16 10:08:56

My story….I had been divorced for 2 1/2 years, and stopped dating for 1 1/2, after becoming vulnerably involved with a separated man and having a painful breakup through that ordeal. I got myself together, not looking for anyone over the year and a half I was alone. Well…. I was in a training class and met a man there through work, who was highly successful Executive in our company, engaging, funny, and interested in me. He was married, no ring, and I could “sense” he was not happy where he was in life. Needless to say, our class lasted for a week, and we were required to come back for another week and present our project. This all transpired in offsite in another state from where we both lived, he lived in a different state than I also, but our common link was through our company. I knew he was respected, and I knew I cared about him. Silly me… read on…

We spent every waking hour together, with the team of other classroom colleagues. Breakfasts, lunches, dinners, drinks…..for a week straight, then another week a month later. He paid attention to me, listened to me, charmed me and I knew we had an attraction that would spark a relationship. He and I were together the last night of the class before we left. He came to see me in my state the week after we got back. He explained that he’d been thinking of leaving his wife for quite some time, and told her he wanted a divorce. He moved out and we became a long distance boyfriend/girlfriend and quite serious. I was the “straw” which encouraged him that things were better “out there” and he could have more. He called me a “keeper”…. We were in “love?” ….

I have 2 children who became close to him, and he to them. Each time he came there were difficult feelings prior to and after his visit. It was difficult being in a long distance relationship, but ultimately, he was told he would be transferred to my state via work. So… we stayed together for over a year. During that year, there were times he would question if he should be in a relationship, and I would tell him to be alone. He would get upset, and say we needed to work on it. We did the whole getting together for 3 or 4 days at a time, just about every three weeks. I was joyous before he came, got thrilled seeing him at the airport, and so sad when he left. We talked every day for hours on the phone. We were close….but were we really? I feel, looking back, that I set myself up for disaster with a capital “D!”.

We went away on vacation 8 mos after we met, and took my boys. He came back from that trip AGAIN saying “maybe” he should not be in a relationship (he was in a 22 yr marriage prior to me and with no one else but me). Ok…so you see by now where I am heading with this? I feel like a clueless idiot…. But I “LOVED” him.! Gosh….

So…I drove him back to the airport after our vacation and asked him what he thought, and he said, “we just need to talk more”. I dropped him off at the curb of the airport and said, “there’s nothing more for us to talk about, I just want to put this behind me.” I hugged him and drove off crying. It was the first school day for my children, and I had to put on a happy face… I did….for them, while I was dying inside.

We SLOWLY broke up for the next 6 weeks. Every time he thought he was REALLY losing me, he reached out. Every time I was weak, I reached out. Finally a real breakup occurred, and was bittersweet. He told me over the phone he needs to feel what he feels about me, and told me he loved me, and that we needed to end what we had. Ok…we did. Not easy, but I did not contact him. It was worth every day that passed, to HOPE that he would SEE what I meant to him, and we would happily get back together and live “happily ever after”… I say that in jest, somewhat, looking back, because he needed to be alone for a long time to get his thoughts together, learn about himself, etc. I knew, intuitively, from the very first time we were together, that it would be wrong to get involved and not allow this to happen. I did it anyway….I let my heart lead my head. I didn’t think I’d ever meet anyone like him… so…

We broke up and he called me after 3 weeks, and flew me to his state to reconcile. He was all over me, wanting me, needing me, professing all kinds of things. The next two months were “weird”….not quite the same. Then in Dec, when he was supposed to come for 5 days, and had me set up a New Year’s Eve party, he broke up with me 12 hours before he was supposed to come. I was devastated! I had to have a party without him, with friends and my boys, return his gifts and question his moral integrity to not have the guts to come and talk with me in person. It was the worst nightmare of my life.

We broke up and got back together to “talk” 3 months later. Silly girl….. what was I thinking, you ask? I’m asking the same thing myself. Well, that was pretty horrible and turned out to be a “revelation” that he was seeing someone else…. I called her, she dumped him, and we “kept in touch”…. Gosh…I hate that this is me writing this, as I “hear” the progression of this….

So…we keep in touch….and decide to go on vacation together 3 mos later. We had not been together or seen each other in 3 mos, only talking, texting, emails, etc. We had a fabulous, romantic time away …sun and fun. No commitment on his part. Why should he? He had this woman that allowed him to do anything, forgave him, and give more chances. Great sex, so why not go away? Hmmmm…

Ok…we come back from vacation and he owes me $ for the trip, which he offered to give me. This man earns well over the average wage for a working American! He comes to my state once a month for business and we thought we’d see each other during his trips, then he could fly away….hmmm…. interesting arrangement. He is scheduled to move here next year. Anyway, first visit after our trip, he arranged to see me both nights he was in town. First night, was ok… second night was horrible! He told me AFTER dinner that he did not want to come back to the house and see my children. He knew I had a sitter to a certain point in time, and this was a conversation we had 3 times prior to his visit, and he could have simply let me know. But no…he didn’t. He chose to wait, deliver his message, and start saying ALL kinds of things at the car outside the restaurant. He didn’t know if he should have gone away, didn’t know if he had feelings…. Didn’t know a lot!!!

So, I wrote an email after that whole night and asked for him to pay me back for our trip to settle up so I could move on. No response after 2 weeks, no contact. Nothing. I am angry, hurt, rejected, embarrassed that I’ve allowed myself to be in this position…..and I realize where my contribution to the demise of this relationship lies. But…. I wanted to share, because, we know when we are doing the “wrong” thing. Don’t do it! Trust your gut, believe in yourself, and be true to you!!!

Love yourself before you love anyone else….

I’m hurting over this, but will get through it.

cc	2007-11-06 02:11:53

i met this wonderful guy over a year ago..weve been best friends lovers and very exclusive not seeing each other everyday either.a few times in the rel.hes mentioned hes not happy but then quickly says i love you and wants to stay together..he tell me im his patner ,his girl..doesnt want to marry at all ..ever ..but then he says he would if someone changed his mind..he has a problem with alchohol..but, i love him and accept him.. for him..hes kind to me never abusive but sometimes physically distant ..cold ..sometimes saying dont ask me or tell me i have to say i love you ...let me show you.he finally told me last friday its over.. he needs time and is confused. he called me 2 days later to see how i am telling me i made him happy and hes miserable now..will he come back?

shelley

2007-11-18 02:11:16

where do i start?ive just seperatered from my husband of 12 years, been together for 16.i dont know what really went wrong.im the social butterfly and he the homebody.i liked to party and go away on weekends with friends,he would'nt say much,when he did id stop but then after a while i start all over again.i guess i was bored,i thought things would work them self's out.i thought it would be great to be single,our daughter is at that age where she will be off to uni soon,so i thought wow,how much fun i would have.well,there is no fun. im heart broken.we decide to part,i was going to move out,he said no, il go,it will be easier.he went off to work that day,that night he rang to say he is staying at a work mates house to give us a break,he never came back.i had him over for dinner but all i did was cry,i hit the bottle pretty hard,i would go to work but would break down,so i would have to come home.i told him i still loved him and wanted him back.he told me he didnt love me anymore,more tears.he told me 2 weeks after seperataing he had meet someone else,i dont think ive felt so much pain in my life.he has now told me has moved in with her and her 3 children within 1 month of him leaving,he told me im he's in love,how?????.he works full time,i work no more then 14 hours per week,he went from our daughter and i can have whats in the house,i told him to take somethings,he didnt want to.even his stereo he said our daughter could have,but then he changed his mind and came and took it,i said no, you said we could have it,he then said,ok il take half of wants in the house.so of course im not in the position to go and buy things again.so he took it.he is paying the home loan still while my daughter and i are living in it.her remaining school fees he was happy to pay for,but now he has changed his mind.he has his own bank account so im not able to accesss funds to pay for bills,the money i earn is enough to buy food and put petrol in the car.
i have to go to welfare tommrrow and ask for help paying for my bills, other wise il be sitting in the dark.its hard when you see your daughter cry and for her to see her mother go thought hell.this xmas will be the sadest xmas of my life.her father has only seen her once since he moved out,that hurts me,i dont understand why??he could not hurt us anymore.i dont know this man i married,he is a stranger.how could he move on so quickley to another women??our beautiful home goes on the market this week.he is not living in and around the things we brought and did together.he is living a new life,while im still here around the momeries.ive been told it will get better,will i dont see the light at the end of the tunnel im afraid.tommmrow im of job hunting so my daughter and i can live a better life.i just want this pain to go away and when i smile i mean it.

Michelle

2008-01-04 01:01:09

Well ladies, I know what you are saying. I am terribly broken hearted and that’s obvious…..I’m in this site!
I have been separated from my ex for 3 months and it hurts as much as it did the day we broke up. I still wonder how I am going to get through the day. I must admit I find some days easier than others, now; thank Christ!

This is the story of how my heart got broken…….

I met my ex 3 years ago. He was gorgeous to look but also a great guy. I am a youngish, professional, single mother of a teenage son. I have had 3 defacto relationships. We were both besotted, moving in together after 3 months. We stayed together for 2.5 years. We had our problems but we loved each (well, that’s what I thought…). I am a workaholic, messy, always late and had become a home body….not good. But I looked after him financially and loved him so, maybe not in my actions….but I really did. I suppose I took him for granted. He was a great guy, a bit of a show-off and a stand over (he had the potential to rub people up the wrong way by being arrogant). We had built up a life together house, cars, dogs, raising my son….a family, for Pete’s sake!

Anyway, the hell started when we had a massive blew over his complacency with money….mind you I was too busy with work to go to his work function…something he liked me attending.

Anyway after the fight we patched it all up. We were both devastated; he smashed our house up that night and said things I will never forget. It was the massive amounts of alcohol he had consumed, when that happened (not too frequently…sometimes) he would punch holes in walls and scream. He could be so aggressive in his manner…but also a DEVOTED life-partner.

We had his best friend staying with us for a month prior to the separation…I thought it would be good for him because he would have more company…not what was about to happen.

THEN, 3 days later he comes home from work we meet on the way in together. He brings me a glass of wine and tells me he wants to separate. From that moment he turned from a man that would do anything for me, to an enemy.

He moved in with his best friend within 2 weeks. Cleaned our house out. I have asked for a very reasonable settlement, which will only really pay off a half of the huge debts he occurred in my name as he is a defaulter.
Well, money does not come easy. He has not paid my son any attention…we lived together for 2.5 years, I can not understand what happened to the man I was marrying in 6 weeks from now.

As a result, I have fallen apart. I repulse myself, I had not spoken to my family for over 2 years. My friends were great, but I needed family. Therefore I had to make contact with my family and they took me in after the lease expired 6 weeks after he left me. I wasn’t able to get a place to live because of the shortfall in rentals. I owned property and worked for wages when I met him but now I don’t have property, instead I just am in huge debt.

I have watched myself deteriorate to appalling levels, and sometimes have no control. I just have to divert the pain with alcohol and drugs. I started with alcohol but have resorted to harder drugs and I mean dangerously hard core etc. I think I have a death wish sometimes. I invade his personal privacy by checking his emails and he is clueless, but I am obsessed with doing it. I am obsessed with psychic reading…The saddest part about this is, I am a recovering drug addict, am not a snooper and don’t go to clairvoyants or take the astrology serious, but now they are the three things I think about constantly. I have let my business partner down considerably at times being so “dragging my feet” so much so that that I thought I was going to loose my business a little while ago. But I manage a bit better with work 3 months compared to when it initially happened.

I look like crap which makes me even hate myself more. My skin is disgusting and my hair is dry and falling out everywhere. I do not sleep or eat much and smoke like a chimney (something I never did before either). My biggest problem is I can’t seem to make the pain go away. Sometimes the struggle is so hard, from the pain.

I never call him and he never calls me unnecessarily. I will email him on the odd occasion to let him know what bill he has to pay etc and he will phone. But he never even checks whether I am alive. I can not believe how he behaves towards me.

He shows me nothing, not a sceric. I am blown away by the man he is. I am so confused….was this the man he always had been? But changed for the period of our relationship? Or is this what he has become? He promised talks, he offered, but he has come forward with anything.

To top it all of he has hooked up with this butch unattractive good friend of his. The only way I know what is going on is buy checking his emails without him having a clue. She is nice, but such a bogan. I am shocked, to be honest. She is so feral I feel a bit comforted. But I still don’t know or understand why her. Truly, he could do so much better. They have been mates for years…but she really is just a mate. My friends I have told have said they are shocked he has hooked up with her.

I have had to start again, in a tiny flat I rent, with what he has left me for the house. I am waiting for him to call about the money and I wait with baited breathe to here him call, but I will not call him, no way. I would never take him back, but I want him to want me and experience what it feels like for me right now. I believe it MIGHT happen, I can not be certain but life does go on. I am getting out and I attract attention but I couldn’t care less. At this point in my life, I have no intention of ever committing to a man again. I would be too frightened. Maybe this feeling will change in time, but it certainly does not feel like it will.

All I can say is that I would never take him back, ever. I believe he will realize one day, but I couldn’t not after what he has done, how he has acted. I truly believe he would not shed a tear if I dropped dead.

But I do want him to have his karma…ever so much and most of all, I want my life back. I want to stop hating myself and enjoy life without drugs and alcohol to numb the experience. I am sure it will get better in time, but it has to because this is still unbearable at times.

I am sure it is the betrayal.

2008-03-29 10:03:25

can you show me how to make me strong

udae

2008-03-29 10:03:40

sam the...

2008-07-20 01:07:01

I can't figure out why she left me and now I can't even go to work. I can eat. I can't sleep, I think of her being with another man! She is so fun and so perfect.

Brit the Wit

2008-07-20 01:07:31

It was not easy but I did it and now he is a full time dad.

anna

2008-10-31 03:10:29

it all started on the frist day of school i like this guy and well that ended when his freind strated to talk to me we hit it off really well. he made me laugh. we feel in love(or so i thuoght) he asked me out. i asked him to wait a week. he did. then a week later we were one. we were a couple for a a mouth and a half. then he dumped me for no reason.

bo who

2008-11-29 12:11:16

All I can say is I am so over him and I can't believe I wasted four years of my life.

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